Oh Daylight Savings, how you vex me...

So we're going on week 2 of the CHANGE, and when I say change, I mean the time I used to refer to as heaven -- FALL BACK, GAIN AN HOUR etc. GAIN an hour??? GAIN???
Once you are a parent, you gain squat. You gain several weeks of misery as your poor, sweet child is trying to figure out what the hell just happened. Why is it dark when I get home from school and BRIGHT BRIGHT BRIGHT when I wake up?

Bug had just started sleeping until 7. 7!!! Pure bliss would be how I would describe the hubby's and my state of being - the kind of bliss that leaves that sort of dumb looking half smile on your face. Then Daylights Savings had to sweep on in and ruin everything. This past week and half has been utter suckyness (if that's not a word, I just made it one!) Some nights, bedtime has been 6:30 because my little man is just plain tuckered out. Then, he wakes at 6 a.m.! Fun times.
Other nights, he gets a second wind and is up until 8p.m. and STILL wakes up at 6 a.m. (or like yesterday, 5 AM!!) Utter torture for me.

This morning, we woke up at 7. Is it a fluke? Could we be adjusting and on our way back to normalcy? I certainly hope so. I feel like life is playing a game with me and I am losing....sleep that is.

My Mom Guilt Morning

This morning I had major mom guilt about taking the bug to school and coming to work. We had such an amazing weekend. He is just such a FUN little boy right now.

Last night, he got really brave and took two steps...ALL BY HIMSELF. He's been cruising along the walls and furniture, but can't balance or stand alone for anything. However, last night he apparantly wanted to get from the coffee table to the couch as fast as possible. He took two steps and then fell face first into some pillows. The smile on his face was PRICELESS. He was so proud of himself.

This morning, he was all smiles and I just hated dropping him off. HATED HATED HATED it. I really wanted to spend the entire day with him. Saturday and Sunday wasn't enough. I wish it was Friday already....or at least 5:30 so I could head out and go pick him up. He's at such a fun age. I want to be with him all the time. Do you hear me world? ALL THE TIME!!!

My consolation prize? Wednesday is a teacher workday at school so I took the day off. Rock on!!!!

So for now, please guilt subside. He loves school. His teachers think he's awesome. He's happy.

My Happy List for the Week

It's about that time...that time when I start to get overwhelmed with work and stress. So how do I handle it? I make a list of the top 10 things that are making me happy this week.

1. Homemade chili. Huge thanks to my husband for giving me the last bowl for lunch today!
2. My BFF. I had a challenging day yesterday and my best friend sent me flowers. How awesome is that?
3. An awesome Halloween party. Hubby and I had a great night out on Saturday complete with lots of laughter and good times.
4. Family coming into town this weekend. Both my sister and my aunt & cousin will be in town on Saturday. I can't wait to see them.
5. So You Think You Can Dance!
6. Dairy Queen's Banana Pudding Blizzard! Holy O Face!
7. My little man trying to walk. So cute!
8. TWO NEW EMPLOYEES at work. I am so excited to have more fun people to work with.
9. Thinking of fun Christmas and Birthday presents for my two favorite boys. December will be here before I know it.
10. My husband. When I left the house today, I said "Thanks for yesterday." His response "Thanks for every day." LOVE HIM!!

What's making you happy?

Don't judge me. What does YOUR house look like?

*My name is Erin. And I have a pile problem.*

Let's get one thing out of the way before I get into this post - I am not a neat freak. I am not, by any stretch, a DIRTY person, but I am not an obsessive, clean neatnik. In face, I envy those people to the Nth degree. Those people - my mother, my best friend. Oh how I wish I could be you. (In fact - Mom, are you sure you are my mother? I didn't inherit your spick and span nature nor your green thumb. Boo.)

Now that we've gotten that out there - I want to know what the hell has happened to my house. It is OUT OF CONTROL. Before the bug was born, the hubby and I would go on bi-weekly...maybe monthly cleaning sprees where we could tackle the whole house in one day, wait another month or until we were having company over and do it again. Since the bug, it's gotten worse. We did hire a cleaning lady, who, god bless her, comes once a month. However, I still have to pick up before she comes. Why? BECAUSE I HAVE A MAJOR “PILE” problem.

Seriously, it’s really bad. I just take all the crap that is all over my house and create random piles of stuff. Hey, it looks nicer…well nicer than crap strewn about all over.
I need an intervention. I know I need an intervention because the other morning when my darling husband pointed to one of three piles on our kitchen table and barely opened his mouth – I became a heinous, defensive witch. Oh dear.

I don’t know where to start. I don’t know how to change! Somebody? ANYBODY? HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!! It’s so much worse post-baby. I don’t have the energy or the bandwith to deal with my house. And I know there is no way I can be the only person who feels this way.

Hubby and I both work all day 40-50 hours a week. Sometimes we travel. We come home, we make dinner, we play with the bug, we put the bug to bed and then we crash on the couch to chat, bond and watch TV. On weekends, I no more want to vacuum and clean my toilets than I want to drink straight from the toilet bowl and eat cat poo. It cannot continue this way. I need some sort of neatness vibe injected into this sad, pathetic, somewhat lazy brain of mine.

Wow. I admitted it. In writing. It’s out there. I can’t take it back. Sometimes…I AM LAZY!!!!!!!!!! Whew…I feel so much better.

But in all seriousness, does anyone have any advice? I can’t continue this way and in this economy, our treasured monthly clean sweep might have to go the way of the dinosaur.

Ahhh...need a distraction

So I have a huge, looming project in front of me....and what am I doing? Taking a quick break to think about the positive things in my life. (Take that NetSuite Upgrade, your glitches will not defeat me.)

Our weekend got a little crazy and I didn't get a chance to write my "things that make me happy" list for the week. So here goes (a few days late):

1. My mother. Best babysitter ever and always one to brighten my day.
2. Target. The happiest place on Earth...I don't care what Disney says.
3. Sloppy kisses from the bug. Baby kisses are the BEST.
4. DVR -- oh how I love thee!
5. A phone call from a major publication about one of SCI's products.
6. Halloween Candy. 'nuff said.
7. Quality candidates for our open position. I am a sucker for a good cover letter.
8. My new favorite Web site, Aiming Low! Hi-freakin'-larious. No kidding.
9. Augusta's Creation Pimento Cheese - holy heaven! Seriously, you need to check it out.
10. And finally, an awesome anniversary dinner at Fleming's with my hubby. FUN NIGHT OUT complete my dear friend, Pinot Grigio!

Five years ago today...

Five years ago today, I married my best friend. I took a vow, to have and to hold, to love and to cherish the most amazing man I know. This man is truly my BEST everything.


It is true intimacy when you find someone you can be your true self with - and that includes singing into your hair brush while making up ridiculous song and dancing like a real jackass at 11 p.m. when he wants to go to bed. And he loves me anyway!


It's been a great ride honey. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for helping me create such a beautiful baby boy. Thank you for being the one I laugh with and cry with. I love you and look forward to all the years to come.

XOXO.

I am so honored! Today I am the Featured Blogger on The Blog Rollers Check out my write-up.

It's a Girls Night

Having time to spend with my friends is a real luxury these days! Before the bug, I was able to talk to my friends several times a month and we'd try our best to get together on a fairly regular basis. Post baby? Wow, it's a crap shoot! I'll go months without seeing some of my closest friends. And honestly, it totally sucks, but none of us really know how to change it.

But tonight we're TRYING! We are going out to the Junior League of Raleigh SHOPPING SPREE gala. I am stoked. Not only do I get so spend time with some of my best girls, but I get to SHOP (something else I don't really have time for). I spent all last night and this morning setting up one of the booth vendors, and with all the sneak peeks I saw...I am ready.

If you are in the Raleigh area, head on down to the Convention Center this weekend. I think you'll find it worth your while!

Things that make me happy...

My best friend is taking a stab at becoming a contract blogger for NatureMade. They are looking for someone to write about what puts them in a good mood. Coleen is awesome, amazing and many more fabulous adjetives....but of course I feel that way. She's my best friend. However, if you take out that I'm extremely biased and look at the facts, she is the perfect person for this job. You can vote for her here.

Her doing this has got me thinking about what puts ME in a good mood. I am generally a happy person. I don't sweat the small stuff and try to appreciate all that I'm given. But like most people, I have my off days.

To counter those off days, I want to start writing about things that make me happy --from things that make me smile to things that make me laugh so hard I almost pee my pants.

Here are things that are making me happy today:
1. The bug's laugh.
2. The bug attempting to dance. (It's a little head bob a la Stevie Wonder. Adorable.)
3. My husband fixing my car.
4. My morning coffee.
5. That I get to go see my friends this afternoon for a mommy and baby playdate.
6. The chicken pot pie that is baking.
7. My kitty trying to get comfortable in my lap right now.
8. The bug in his Halloween Frog costume.
9. Peanut Butter and Jelly
10. Hugging my husband.

What's making you happy today?

Incredibly Thankful

October is Pregnancy Loss Awareness Month and yesterday was actually Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. I lay in bed last night thinking about the babies that I've lost...thinking about what they would have looked like and what kind of personalities they would have had. I thought about what the bug would have thought of his siblings....and then I thought about how lucky I am.

After all the heartache, all the pain, all the tears....J and I created this amazing, beautiful miracle. Our Wonderbug. He's all I could have asked for and more. My heart hurts when I'm not around him and grows fuller by the day because of him. Being a parent has brought so much more joy into my life. As much as I wanted to be a mother before, there's no real way to explain it and how it changes your life. Earlier today I was trying to put it into words for a friend of mine and I teared up. I just couldn't find a correct expression or an exact phrase that encompassed all that my heart...all my soul... wanted to say.

I grieve for the babies I lost. I hope that those sweet little angels look down on their brother and bless him daily. I pray that all couples who are struggling now to create their own little miracle are granted their wish...be it naturally, with the help of amazing, dedicated doctors or by the grace of someone else...that they one day hold their baby in their arms, that they get to experience the creation of life. It's an amazing, beautiful,crazy thing....and I am so incredibly thankful that I get to experience it.